Uh, Thanks, but No Thanks

What's the weirdest/stupidest/funniest/most irritating reason you've ever been dumped?

This isn't always the real reason you've been "released back into the wild." Those are sometimes more sensible/reasonable, sometimes even stupider.
And this doesn't have to be romantic dumping, it may be dumped as a friend or employee.

Me, I've got two: I was once dumped because I was a virgin (helloooo, a little effort on your part and that wouldn't be the case, dumbass) and once because I am not Asian (you didn't notice before this?). This last would have been funnier if I hadn't been the one that was dumped, but it has a certain amount of bizzareness that I appreciate.


John the Scientist said...

Was the second dumper Asian? If so, he was never really serious.

My wife thought we were going to have that problem with the FIL, but he was cool with it.

Nathan said...

Once upon a time, I started seeing a girl...who was dating someone who worked for me. I contrived to send him out of town for two weeks so I could get the inside track. She dumped me about 10 minutes after his return. In parting, she said, "What? I was supposed to pay for my own dinners for two weeks?"

He dumped her within a week.

Nathan said...


I'm also unbearably curious to know what brought this subject to mind.

MWT said...

RE: the first one "Oh. So how about I just go sleep with your best friend and then get back to you?" :p

Stacey said...

You've been married before (uh, you've known that for 2 mos) so you coudn't possibly have a capacity to be loved by someone else. Might I add a Mama's boy who parroted. Oh right, I wasn't opposed to integration.

Random Michelle K said...

Most common reason for me to get dumped: Too crazy/unstable. (I got better!)

But I also had a lot of "this totally isn't working" splits, as well as me being the dumper.

Anonymous said...

Getting dumped for "being emotionally imature". Thing is that he was the momma's boy and couldn't leave me alone.

good luck Thursday.

Anne C. said...

John, no, but seriousness is not always the first thing I look for, so I'll say you're probably right. Plus, I think there were other issues. It's just the reasoning that made me roll my eyes.

Nathan, there's just some things you'll never know. I do like the occasional cryptic post, remember?

MWT, I like your thinking! ;P

Stacey, I'm rolling my eyes again. :D

Michelle, the "not working" reason is probably the sanest reason I've ever heard. And speaking of being the the dumper, I'll admit, I've occasionally done it the chicken way. "Maybe he won't notice I'm not calling anymore..."

Rebekah, yours made me laugh and thanks for the luck!

Thanks for making me laugh, everyone! I needed that today. :)

voyagerinmo said...

This post reminds me of all of the "near-misses" I ran into while still single, including the one who
"wasn't sure why she was on Match.com anyway since she wasn't interested in a relationship", still another who decided that, after praying about it, that "God had told her that I wasn't the right guy for her", and still another, who just out of the blue after hitting it off, told me that "you're not the One", like a scene out of the Matrix.

Trust me ... when the right one comes along: you'll know it.