1.28.2005

Ships Passing In The Night

Last night I went out with a bunch of friends. We hung out at a bar, but I didn't get drunk because I don't have the dough to drink heavily (at least through the next couple weeks, anyway).
The occasion was that one of our group is moving back to North Dakota to be closer to his family. He just moved back from there last summer, when I got to know him a little during a couple camping trips. I was attracted to him and found him really interesting, but didn't find opportunity to say so, since I almost never saw him after I figured out that I liked him. When I finally had an opportunity, I said I was interested in getting to know him better, but by then he was dating someone else. Now he's moving to North Dakota (and I doubt the girlfriend will be joining him, since according to him she wants to move to LA and work on her acting career, but you never know).
Last night, I was reminded that I really do still find him attractive and interesting, was reminded of my bad timing (which is almost always the case), and wondered if there was anything I could have done differently or if I will ever get this stupid dating thing right.
Ah, but you're dwelling in the past/future, I hear you say. Live in the moment! True, I say. I did that, and the truth is -- I'm happy with now and the past is the past and the future is unknown and can't be predicted because the person I am today is not the person I was this summer. But I still have a little lingering sadness of what will never be. This too shall pass.

1 comment:

The Herdsman said...

You know the old addage "there's one person for eadh of us"? Bollocks!

This is not to say that we should simply jump at the first partner that comes along, not at all. We live in a universe of endless combinations and permutations, where time and space are not absolutes; the possibilities are infinite. And we live in an environment where preconceptions of relationships are crumbling; so even societal pressures should no longer be limiting factors (seems you're on board with this one from you recent "I love life" post).

So all I can say is "patience my darling sister ... this too shall pass!" I look forward to the day when you bring a loving life-partner who challenges you to be all you can be to family gatherings, for that I too will be patient :o) Love you!