Advice from Carolyn

One of my guilty pleasures is reading Carolyn Hax's advice column. It's not something I talk about much, but her advice is so practical, so common-sense. That makes it sound boring when it's not. It's actually really hard to use common-sense sometimes when the emotions are involved, and reading her advice column is a regular reminder to use it.

Today's article had a really good reminder for me to trust my own judgement in future relationships. To take responsibility for what I've experienced, but not blame. I was going to save the link for myself in a private archive, but for some reason, I feel like putting it out here. Maybe one of you needs to hear it too...

Later: I had a quote in here, but every time I read it, it sounded weird and I think it's because it's out of context. So, you'll have to go to the actual article (see link above) to read it. Instead, I'll give a summary. She said that nothing happens out of the blue, that there are always signs. So instead of dwelling on the thing that happened "out of the blue," think about why you ignored or didn't see the signs. Once you trust yourself to see and interpret the signs, you can trust that you'll see something the next time. Essentially, trust your ability to judge a person and a situation. (In my case, I sometimes doubt my ability to judge.)