Christmas Trimmings

I have given myself over to the madness of Christmas preparations. I've put the novel on hold and am living guilt free for the next two weeks or so.
Presents were bought (more spent this year than any year before, I believe) in two evenings and one morning of intensive shopping and were wrapped in one afternoon and one evening of intensive wrapping. I have my wrapping scheme, of course -- silver and white this year -- and I've packed all the presents ready for transportation to OK.
I've attended holiday parties. My sister was my date at the office party and we both had a good time. I did much better at the Texas Hold'em Poker table than I thought I would (being my second time). I didn't mingle as much I perhaps should have. Oh well.
I got to reconnect with an old friend whom until Sept. I hadn't seen in 6 years. In Sept. she got married and to my surprise and delight, she invited me. As is usual with weddings, I didn't get to talk to the bride or groom much, so I was happy when they said they would be spending a week in December skiing in CO. I had a wonderful time visiting them.
I've also managed to keep up with my soccer team. We've been moved up to the B League (out of 4) and though it's been challenging, it's been fun. I've also been helping out with a beginner tai chi class. Unfortunately, that means I'm going to have to carve out a third day in the week to go to the upper level class for my own improvement.
I really do love Christmas, despite the strains on my wallet and time and despite the stress. I love showing how much I care about my family and friends.

Weekend Good. Weekdays Bad?

Well, I got lots done on the novel this weekend. Not as much as I would have liked, but I made it through a tough spot in the story (thanks to my ranting on this blog). But this week I've got lots of other stuff planned. This evening it's groceries and make catfood. Tues. and Thurs. I'm helping with a tai chi class. Wednesday I'm going to a poker class. Ok, so that last one is definitely not a responsibility, but our office's holiday party is going to feature Texas Hold'em poker and blackjack. Last year I lost lots of fake money at the blackjack table. This year I hope to do better at poker. The only drawback is that I suck at poker. Fortunately, our office manager set up a "learn poker" night. So you see, I must go. (Yeah, don't look at me all skeptical like that.)
My hope is that I use this pressure to eliminate procrastination (which always happens when I have tons of time) and still manage to write enough to keep my head above water until next weekend. I also hope to write during my lunch hour, which should help a little. We'll see. It also entirely depends on how easy or hard the story is flowing. Sunday I would have made out like gangbusters except that the story was flowing slower than molasses in January in the Artic circle.
Crossing fingers and toes...

Collectively speaking

Today a group of online friends are keeping up a running joke about me (hard to explain the "train" of thought -- bored number-checker to zombie number-checker) on the site we visit. It makes me laugh and feel teary at the same time. As a self-described loner (originally spelled that "loaner" - Freudian slip?), I'm establishing the first really long-term relationships (aside from my dear and loony family) in my life. I've lived in the same city for 6 years now - longest in my adult life. I'm playing a team sport - coed indoor soccer. I've been going to tai chi classes pretty regularly twice a week for 2 1/2 years now - definitely longest I've ever done any exercise regimen. I've been hanging with the same group of friends for over four years. And I own a house and have pets (one does not "own" cats ;).
I don't know what was stopping me from keeping long term relationships before, but I have to admit, it's heartwarming and embarrassing to receive love/friendship in that way. It felt so when my sister arranged a surprise birthday party for me, and I know that's why she doesn't want me to elope if I ever do get married. And maybe I'm settling down enough now that I actually won't. (No promises though, Aileen!)
I made a snarky comment a few posts ago about being a "dependable member of society." I wonder if that's not such a bad thing any more. There are worse things than having people depend on you.

Society's Pull

I just wrote this in an email to a friend and thought it was a good general observation:

One interesting thing I've noticed is that I've seen a definite increase in people needing something from me. Tonight I'm helping a tai chi teacher with his class and possibly helping a gal at work with something she volunteered to do for my boss' board of education campaign. Then there's said boss' request for more help, which since I already said I'd help I will do probably this weekend. That, plus - taking care of a friend's cats while she was sick, and another friend who wants to rent my basement but hasn't yet (boyfriend is lobbying hard) - and the general request that people donate to this or that disaster relief... well, I just think it's interesting. Is it always like this and I'm only just established as a dependable member of society or is it a current wave of need?

Where have I been?

...I hear you all ask.
Well, let me explain. I have moved up the food chain at work and now have project organization duties as well as production tasks. Plus, we've got more work to do than we have people, so I'm occasionally asked to do stuff for other projects. Obviously, this means I'm having trouble finding the time to do any non-work related tasks.
Then there's home. I've been trying to do everything more "right" lately. That means going to tai chi class regularly, making a decently nutritious dinner, cleaning up dirty dishes, and going to bed early. And I'm hooked on too many TV shows.
Now I understand why people seem to have cell phones surgically attached to their heads and don't mind having private conversations in public. No one has the time to sit down and make the time to just communicate.
My current plan to clear more time in my schedule is cutting out some of the TV watching (though most of the time I'm also doing something else) and a lot of my internet surfing. :(
I will try to keep up this blog at least once or twice a week and whenever I'm moved to say something pithy. And the entries may be short, just a thought of the day, like the last post or something that happened. For example:
- My car's odometer just flipped over 100,000 miles this morning! I've been carrying my digital camera so I could take a picture. Which I pulled over and did. :)
- Last week, on the way to lunch, I saw a hawk eating a pigeon by the sidewalk. It was *so* cool. I didn't have my camera, so I didn't take a picture. :(

Take a Load Off, Annie

The lesson for today, apparently, is "relax."
All morning I was fretting over how to respond to a situation at work. It was not a big deal, but sometimes my brain won't stop examining things from every angle. Best to just let it whirr at times like those. As I left for work everything clicked into place and I thought "oh, forget it, I'm just not going to worry about it." As you might expect, my being relaxed either alleviated the situation itself or allowed me to notice new aspects that made me see it in a new light. No more puzzling situation.
and
Today in tai chi class, our lesson of the day was to relax when doing a particular basic move. It was one I was sure I wasn't doing quite right and I was correct. I was over stretching, putting strain on my neck and shoulder muscles. The teacher focused on relaxing and keeping the correct form or structure.
So, there you go.
I like finding the patterns in life and this is my meditation for the day. ;)

Busier Than Ever

What a productive weekend!
Friday night: tai chi holiday party (got a stupid purple dolphin candle in a white elephant gift exchange)
Saturday: snowboarding in the morning, Christmas shopping in the evening (got an awesome dress for the office holiday party)
Sunday: went into work, then visited my sister, then played soccer (we lost, but felt like we played well -- interesting contrast to the weekend before)

Giving up on the challenge off goofing off for the present. Too much holiday stuff to get done.

Remember I said I was having a little trouble with being unusually pissed off unexpectedly? Well, it seems to have gone away completely. I'd blame it on the old three letter acronym that starts with a P, but it lasted for months.

Things are looking up.

End of a long week

Every been attracted to someone so good-looking (in your opinion) that you can't even imagine the two of you as a couple?

Yeah, me neither. ;)

I've successfully goofed off while watching TV this week. Woo hoo!
Tomorrow I'm going snowboarding with friends and Sunday I have to come in to work.
Hopefully somewhere in there I'll be able to get some shopping done. Presents bought: Zero.
Also, hopefully, I catch up on some email that I haven't replied to because of the month of writing.

Tonight I'm going to a potluck thing given by the place I go to for tai chi. I wasn't planning to, but they're such nice people I'd feel bad blowing them off.
"No, sorry, I'm not going because I'm feeling a bit anti-social right now."

Too much fun?

I have, in the past, been a wallflower (out of my own choice, God knows why). After shucking that appellation, I decided not to pass up anymore opportunities for fun and entertainment. It wasn't really a conscious decision, like a New Year's Resolution or anything, more like a necessary step towards taking part in life. Well, I have lived up to this decision and rarely regretted it. Last weekend I kinda did. No, let's say Last Week.
Monday, after work, I went shopping (cat stuff, vinyl tile, etc. - multiple stores, thankfully in the same general area). Tuesday I went to Tai Chi class after work. Wednesday I went to dinner with aunts and uncles. Thursday I went to a BBQ. Friday I went to Tai Chi class having missed my regular Thursday class (the instructor was a real taskmaster). Saturday, I painted more of the basement and tried to spend some quality time with the cats because... Saturday afternoon I drove up to Steamboat Springs to join my friends camping. Sunday morning I drove back to Denver (the cats still remembered me! Whew!) just in time to unpack the car and get changed and go to participate in a Tai Chi demonstration. Then we went out to dinner afterwards. Once again, I got back with just enough time to change and go to a 9:30 soccer game.
I was pretty tired by that point, but I knew that if I didn't show up, I'd be dooming some poor gal to playing the entire game. There were 3 girls (including myself) which wasn't as bad as only 2, but it certainly wasn't as nice as 4 or more. I'm glad I went, but I felt awful immediately after it. We lost 7-3. :( One of those was me making an own-goal, which frustrated me *so much*, but it happens sometimes.
So. Too much fun? A tiny bit, yes. I'll still accept invites, but hopefully I'll be able to scale it back a bit. Tonight I'm going to paint pottery with friends, but next weekend I only have "tile the basement floor" to be accomplished (with a friend who has offered to help). I may see about visiting family up in Loveland, but I don't know if they're having a get together for the holiday or something. We'll see.
In the meantime, Carpe Diem.

Tired is a tired does...

Yesterday I wanted to take a nap while taking my tai chi class. Yes, it's very relaxing, but it is also a lot of work, ie. you sweat and breathe heavily by the end of it. In between, however, I wanted to curl up and take a nap. I've been feeling tired all day (except, of course, at night, when I'm supposed to be tired and go to sleep early) for the last few weeks. During some of that time, of course, my tiredness was due to dog-induced sleep deprivation, but for the most part, I have no apparent reason to be tired.
In the past I have enforced an early bedtime and achieved some results, particularly alertness immediately after rising, but not consistent throughout the day alertness. Hmm... actually, exhaustion strikes more particularly during the work day. Coincidence? I think not. Solution? Get my butt in gear and become a self-employed full-time novelist. Impossible? No. Hard work? Yes.